I have been pondering some big words, like vulnerability and helplessness lately.
For me, being a very independent person and mostly a loner, asking for help and vulnerability are all uncomfortably woven together.
I have spent a lot of time in Senegal, West Africa where people live naturally in community and extended families. I learned that the extreme “hyper-independence” in my American culture is really a kind of sickness, a pathology…an unhealthy way of being.
In fact, our human brains are wired for group interaction, for family group, community, relatedness and communication with others. Our very survival as a species has been rooted in recognizing that we need each other to not only survive, but also to thrive.
So, recently I stood up and stated, “I have lost my way. I need help seeing what is really important. I need help seeing where I should devote my time and energy. I need help seeing where I should not be spending time and energy. I have said YES to too many people and too many projects. I am exhausted and spread too thin.”
Although that was uncomfortable (for less than a minute), it was also liberating and allowed a group of people I deeply trust and respect to be clear mirrors, to give me input and wisdom, guidance and caring.
This has allowed me to see more clearly and to turn the rudder of my ship in a direction in which the wind fills my sails and in which I do not feel pulled in 10 directions every day.
I challenge you to take a small step toward vulnerability.
Reveal to someone where you are lost, confused, uncomfortable, frightened and ask for help, for feedback, for support. Let us know what happens by posting on our facebook page.
